Life as a Spectator Sport

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Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Greetings from Kingsport, Tennessee

Not where I had planned to be today. Clarence watched the weather forecast yesterday morning and informed me that I would have to do the southwest Virginia inspections on Tuesday and Wednesday if I wanted to be able to do them at all. He was right, but that doesn't lessen my irritation at his increasing attempts to control my working life. Work has always been my way of getting away from him, and from his determination to manipulate everything I did. Having to take him with me when I worked was annoying and time-consuming, but at least I was still in charge of the work itself.

Now, as his cognitive abilities are beginning to return, his former personality is coming back with a vengeance. I mentioned this somewhat grumpily to his doctor, who assured me that Clarence only wanted to "be a part of things." No. Clarence is either running everything going on around him, or he is obstructing it. Those are the only two choices you get with him. So unless I want him to actively interfere with my work, I have to allow him to believe he is in charge of it. So here I sit, where I would probably have decided to be anyway, if Clarence had simply alerted me to the weather and asked if I didn't think it would be a good idea to head out here promptly.

I know how whiny that sounds, and in fact, it is a minor complaint. Clarence can't answer my company phone any more, as he used to, and give erroneous information to my customers. He no longer has access to company funds, though he has begun to inform me whether or not he believes a particular expenditure is permissible. But he can't interfere in the ways he used to, and I'm grateful for that. I tell myself that the rest of it is the price I'm paying for eventual ownership of the land, and for the living expenses I don't have now.

But it's still aggravating.
posted by Liz @ 8:00 AM     |


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